Mad About Max by Holly Jacobs

Author:Holly Jacobs
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: BelleBooks, Inc.
Published: 2016-03-14T04:00:00+00:00

Six

“MYRTLE? FERN, BLOSSOM? Where are you guys when I really need you?” Grace whispered, hoping Clarence wouldn’t hear her.

“You called us?” Myrtle asked sweetly.

“Did I call you?” Grace hissed. “Did I call you?”

She gave way to a short burst of hysterical laughter. Her life used to be simple and uncluttered, quiet even. It was gone now. The quiet and the solitude had disappeared, much like her sanity. Gone, history, finito . . .

“Dear, is there a problem?” Fern asked. Then she added, “Blossom, move over, you’re practically sitting on my lap.”

“No, I’m not. You’re practically on my lap. Myrtle make her stop.”

“Girls,” Myrtle admonished them both. “We’re in a van and there’s plenty of room. Fern, you sit on my right. Blossom, you’re on my left.” To Grace she said, “You seem to be upset.”

“Upset? I seem upset to you?”

Clarence glanced over his shoulder into the back of the van. “Darling, I understand. My love for you is overwhelming, but you’ll see. It will all work out. And we’ll have such a lovely time together. I’m taking you away to save you.”

“Oh, shut up.” Grace had tried to be patient with her kidnapping, would-be husband, but he was trying her patience. Actually, she was pretty sure that Clarence would test the patience of a saint, something Grace wasn’t. Saints weren’t generally known for being nuts. But with their penchant for sackcloth and ashes, maybe someone should rethink that.

Clarence glanced back and eyed Grace suspiciously. “Your sister’s right; you’re nuts.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying,” Grace muttered.

“Grace, what’s wrong?” Fern asked.

“We’ve only done what you asked,” Blossom added.

She kept her voice low, hoping Clarence wouldn’t notice her conversation with the fairies over the radio. “Let’s outline exactly what you’ve done to me, shall we?

“I was accosted on the freeway by three characters who informed me they were going to help me meet my own-true-love. A cop with pimples called me Ma’am. I won a makeover that did more than make me over. It reinvented me—even turned me from a ma’am back into a miss. I met the man of my dreams in a psychiatrist’s office. I won a gorgeous new wardrobe. I fell in love. Three cancan dancers showed up at my stepsister’s shin-dig and proceeded to wipe out half the guests and . . . Oh, yeah, I’ve been kidnapped by a would-be Romeo who wants to get his hands on all the lovely money that I inherit next year.”

She paused and took a big breath.

“So, yes, I guess you could say I’m a little upset. The question we should ask now is, just what are you—my three, loving fairy godmothers—going to do about all this?”

“Grace,” Myrtle said in her most reasonable voice. “You seem to have forgotten that you wished for this.”

“I wished for this?” Every word she spoke moved up an octave on the scale. “When did I wish for this?”

“Didn’t she say she’d like to get kidnapped, and have Max ride to the rescue—prove his love is real and all that?” Fern asked.

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